Jul 272010

Truthfully, it wasn’t an unusual day. Most of my days go something like this…

After being with someone for 10 years, you tend to think that you know them. And then they say something completely alien. Like Joel this morning, casually confessing that he once owned a love doll. Actually, not just one – two love dolls. One of them even had a reservoir for warm water and a slots for a vibrating egg next to each fuckable opening to make it seem more lifelike (I guess). But he’s NEVER owned a Love Ewe. That was purchased as a gift for a friend.

My date with Harold this afternoon was very good, and not particularly odd, except for masturbating while wearing my two-way. I felt like both a boy and a girl all at the same time. It’s very interesting to grasp my cock while I come. I hadn’t tried that before.

I got Harold and Joel to kiss after dinner. Not with tongue, but still – it makes a grrrl happy to see hot boy-on-boy action!

Then Harold bravely helped me touch up my hair color. Which totally explains why I then dyed his pubic hair Atomic Pink. I mean, why not give it a try? Slathering his nether region with hot pink goop was fun, but ultimately a fail. His pubic hair was too dark to take the color, but his skin took all too well. He now looks like he has a severe and unusual rash. I should mention that Harold was exceedingly happy for me to post this picture. I think it looks clown-like.

Finally, we watched a movie that has to rank in the top ten weirdest movies I’ve ever seen – Romance and Cigarettes. It is certainly about sex, but I can’t even describe how odd it is. Well, it’s a musical. My favorite parts are a trash-mouthed Kate Winslet fucking with great abandon (OMG the things that girl says!), an explicit sex scene played out in shadows against the blinds that involved handstands and cunnilingus, and a dream sequence that has Susan Sarandon having sex with her ex on her husband’s grave, then the ex peeing on the headstone. Despite the fact that the movie ended on kind of a serious down note, there were several places where I really laughed – usually in a kind of shocked disbelief.

So there you go, the odd sex-related things in my otherwise normal day!

  • Evoe Thorne

    P.S. Joel finally revealed the fate of the love dolls. He cut them into little pieces. While I can understand wanting to hide the love doll evidence, it’s kinda creepy in a hack and slash way. I think you should be proud of your plastic partners!

  • http://suckalemonanddie.com TheHookahMaster

    I just dyed my whole head pink today and I love it. Pink hair and I mix very well.