Nov 182010

Phallus vs cleavageI have been called a size queen before. It isn’t true.

Well, okay, it’s sort of true. I do appreciate beautiful cocks. And bigger is always better, right? In practice, not so much. Trust me, there is such a thing as too big. But I always admire a cock that is thick and hard and enormous. It’s like a gift. Or art.

Harold has this bronze statue of a phallus. It’s gorgeous. Real art. An erection a foot tall that I can put my hand around and my thumb and middle finger barely touch! I’ve always eyed it speculatively when no one was around… wondered what it would be like to fuck it. (‘Cuz girls think about these things too.) Not that I’d actually do that. Unless it was being photographed. Yep, exhibitionist.

So when Harold and I were messing around with the camera the other day, trying to create some fabulous pornography, the statue came up (so to speak). Harold put cuffs on my wrists Contemplating cockand tied my arms so they were pulled up behind my back. If I bent over I could just barely put my mouth on that beautiful cock and cover it in red lipstick. Yum.

Surprisingly, to me anyway, the statue was really cold. And extremely hard. As much as I’ve fantasized about the thing, fucking this cock would not be pleasant. It would be cold and painful, even if I were REALLY turned on. I don’t think this is a fantasy I’m likely to act on, but the phallus continues to be inspiring and suggestive from across the room.

Hunting the wild phallusI tried to give the thing proper head. I adore fellatio. I didn’t work very well. Being bound limited my movements and therefore made proper leverage difficult. I didn’t have use of my hands. And, it really was too big. I could only wrap my mouth around the tip. I kept hitting my teeth. Ouch. I had to resort to licking and kissing.

Ultimately, I don’t think we made very good erotic art with the statue. These are a few of the better pictures. But it was fun and educational! For instance, I learned that fantasies are a lovely thing to have and art is best when admired from a distance. Also, cocks are really sexy in a variety of sizes and I prefer them warm and slightly less hard than petrified. Finally, I’d rather be a blow job queen than a size queen.