I really like the way that Joel and I are recreating our sexual relationship. We’ve always had a strong sexual connection, but it’s been challenging over the past couple of years. We’ve both been going through some major personal changes and we had to figure out how to shift from a two parent family to a four parent family. It’s all good, but change is still difficult. I’m proud of us for doing the hard work and staying together. And the sex is pretty awesome.
Originally, our primary connection was through Joel being dominant. Then that started to feel like a violation to me and we struggled to find a new dynamic. A couple of nights ago, I realized that we’ve succeeded in achieving a different kind of sexual relationship. Joel asked me to try putting the “Seven Gates of Hell” on him again. It really hasn’t worked. Maybe I’m just not getting it right, but I think it’s lame. In any event, I gave up and giggled uncontrollably for several minutes. Then I got out some lube and started giving Joel a hand-job.
I’m not sure how long it’s been since I’ve given Joel a hand-job, but I’m pretty sure it was never like this. I kept Joel right on the edge of orgasm for a long time – right to the brink, stop, start over again slowly. And he let me. In the past he would have gotten frustrated, flipped me over, and fucked me. But he let me guide him through waves of pleasure! I’m not even sure that he knew I was doing it on purpose.
I kept asking him if he wanted to orgasm like that. I know, not really fair when you have a guy in that position. I like that we kept talking the whole time I was doing this. I think it was his way of not coming too quickly because his cock is super sensitive. After a while, he asked if he could go down on me and then fuck me. Fuck yeah!
He licked my clit with that efficiency of a couple that has been together for years, building in intensity until I came. The instant I orgasmed he was plunging his cock into me and pumping away. I think that the extra stimulation earlier helped because we fucked for longer than usual. And for once, when Joel came he didn’t deafen me by screaming in my ear or try to break my nose with his forehead. Ah, heaven.
Changing sexual patterns in an established relationship is not easy. I’m grateful that Joel has trusted me enough to give me some space to figure out what I really want. I’m thankful for his patience and understanding that it’s not him that I’m rejecting. In fact, I’m not rejecting any part of our relationship. I’m learning that Joel is even more trustworthy than I had given him credit for and together we are exploring new ways of being together. I believe that we will probably go back to more of a D/s relationship at some point, but with a greater understanding of each other.
Ultimately, what matters to me is the love. That we have in abundance.