Mar 102011

Dice left in the bed to inflict damage on parentsThis morning I am still feeling warm and glowy about what Harold and I did in bed last night. It feels really good. I’m relaxed and I feel very connected to him – and actually everyone else. I’m so in love! What did we do? I’ll tell you.

Last night the baby girl just wouldn’t go to sleep. Harold sat on the couch with her and watched Blues Clues until his brain was numb and he started to drift off to sleep (at least 15 minutes). I came past and mentioned that the night before I’d found a bunch of little dice in our bed, rather like caltrops.  Harold, it turns out, heard me say something rather different.

We took the girl into the bedroom, hoping that she would settle down and sleep, but she was still bouncy. I got out my laptop and played the first likely thing on Netflix. It happened to be a Jackie Chan movie for kids. The acting was a bit painful, but the children were believable and it’s Jackie Chan. As the movie went on, it became funnier. I suspect that Harold and I were just getting loopy – I mean, really, is it that comical to punch someone in the face with a turtle?

By the time the movie ended we were both kind of out of it and the baby girl was still awake. Then Harold asked me what I had meant earlier about our bed being full of little dykes, one of whom was Gwyneth Paltrow. We looked at each other and started to laugh. I don’t think either of us was able to breathe for at least 5 minute.

Rosy glowIt’s not that it was especially hilarious, just that we got to that place of total surrender, where I just let go and laugh. We were rolling around, totally helpless. If one of us managed to gain control for a moment, the other would start in again, setting us both off into peals of maniacal laughter, stomach muscles aching and mouths gasping for air.

This release feels every bit as powerful as orgasming together during sex. It is something shared, a break from the stress, a physical manifestation of pleasure and joy. It’s easy for me to caught up in all of the things around sex (toys, lube, power play, lingerie) and forget that the core of sex is bliss. I’m happy to be reminded that there is more than one path to bliss. Even if that means having little dykes in my bed.