Aug 042014
 

I used to be able to have sex without using anything other than body parts – mouths, hands, cunts, cocks. Nothing will ever take the place of flesh, but I now find that there are certain…tools…that I pretty much can’t live without. Since I don’t often have kinky sex at home, I have a sex kit and I carry it around in an innocuous black backpack. I never use everything in one sitting, but I never know what I might want. It’s become a bit of an art determining what my necessities are.

Wanna know which sex toys/tools I care enough about to carry around with me? I recently emptied out my bag and took a picture so I could share…

Sex kit

  1. Play piercing supplies – I have sharps of various lengths and gages, antibiotic cream, and tiny corks to put on the ends of needles if people want to wear them around a bit.
  2. Scalpel – This is a surgical grade scalpel with disposable blades that I use for blood play. Sometimes I just feel moved to carve a heart in Harold’s ass!
  3. Nitrile gloves – A must have! These non-latex babies get used any time someone puts fingers inside my vagina (my pH balance is delicate) and for anal play.
  4. Condoms – Not just for safer sex! Condoms are also awesome for easy toy clean up. Mine are latex free and non-lubricated if I can find them. I react badly to most lubes.
  5. Lubricant – My current favorite is Sliquid Naturals Sassy because it’s thicker, lasts longer, is non-irritating, and doesn’t taste like anything.
  6. Band-aids – This is more about being prepared for little mishaps than anything sexy. Not shown in this picture, but equally important is feminine hygiene products!
  7. Lip balm – For kissable lips and smooth blow jobs.
  8. Nipple clamps – I carry four types of nipple clamps and a set of sugar tongs for pinching. I have to admit, I like using the clothes pins best (on other people).
  9. Vibrator – Inside the mysterious black bag is my Mystic Wand. I have several because I want to have one within reach at all times. If I could only have one sex tool, this would be the one. Not only do I use it to get myself off, a vibrator is tons of fun on a cock.
  10. Lil Devil – This battery powered electrosex toy produces an electrical shock when both prongs touch skin. It can make for some intense sensations.
  11. Stronic Zwei – Delivers strong pulse action to the prostate or g-spot.
  12. Aneros – We’ve tried many different butt plugs and Aneros is far and away the best. Everyone seems to orgasm harder with one of these in their ass. SERIOUSLY.
  13. njoy Fun Wand – Although this is heavy, it’s so worth the weight. This is the most versatile sex tool I own. And it’s shiny.
  14. Wartenberg wheel – One of my favorites for sensation play. I have to admit that I like to use it on scrotums so I can watch little drops of blood well up.
  15. Strap-on harness – My harness is red leather. I love it for pegging. And feeling butch.
  16. Dildo – I can’t remember what brand this is, but it’s a perfectly average silicone dildo. At about a handspan, it seems to be a perfect size for almost everything I want a dildo to do.
  17. Rope – I like to carry a variety of rope because you just never know what kind of situations you’ll find yourself in. No wait, I have a variety of rope because I know I’ll be up to mischief! I like the lighter weight stuff for things like cock bondage. Heavier rope is great for tying people to trees.
  18. Carabiners – Handy for stringing people up! Also good for a quick release when I need to fuck them instantly.
  19. Chain – This is a 6 foot length of chain. I suppose in theory I could use it for bondage, but really what I like is to insert the length of it into my cunt one link at a time with lots of lube. That’s why it’s sterilized and sealed in a plastic bag.
  20. Ball whackers – Harold made both of these tools for ball torture. I usually start with the soft solid black one then work up to the harder wooden-handled one. His pleasure really turns me on.
  21. Fleshwrap – This clever device is like a push-up bra for scrotums. Goes well with #1 and #14.
  22. Ball Ties – Harold likes binding his balls. Through extensive experimentation, he has discovered that lengths from women’s tights work best. I like bright colors!
  23. Vise – When I want maximum impact, I reach for the vise. It’s another tool that Harold made for ball torture. See it here and here. We’ve even tried fitting a breast in there!
  24. Collar – Harold has a purple leather/leopard fur collar that I put on him when I’m feeling especially Toppy.
  25. Rabbit fur – My rabbit fur is painted to look like leopard, of course. Nothing beats the sensual feel of fur.
  26. Cuffs – Black leather wrist and ankle cuffs are a necessity. I have a set that Joel handcrafted for me, but it feels wrong to use them with everybody else. This is my general use set.
  27. Leather paddles – Harold made both of these larger ones. The black one is very well made and fairly standard. The pink heart is like a child’s valentine gone horribly wrong, but I love it. It stings like fuck! (The teeny one off to the side is great on cocks.)
  28. Floggers – We own a several floggers, but these two ended up in my bag. The black one is a commercial model and Harold made the green leather one. It’s heavier and generally better.
Jul 132014
 

BraggingMaybe it isn’t nice to brag, but I’m not a nice person and I’ve had an incredible week. Seriously, amazing! After complaining about not getting enough sex over the last bit, I am suddenly romantically and sexually saturated. I mean like, sex nine times in the past week! I haven’t been this active in years.

I love summer. All of my happy sexual energy flows like a fountain when the weather heats up. I’ve been investing energy in nurturing my existing relationships and going out into the world and cultivating new relationships. Now everything has blossomed in the summer sun.

I am so grateful for the amazing people in my life – the ones I’ve written about before and a couple of new ones I’m sure I will be writing about! (There are even a few people still on the hook for later.) In the mean time, let me break down my wild week for you…

  • That feeling when you admire someone from afar and then all of a sudden you find out that they are into you too? Yeah, I’ve been chatting all week with a gloriously gorgeous, sexy, smart woman.  Flirting and getting to know her makes me glow.
  • Now that I’ve made a commitment to do more photo shoots, I have many awesome people volunteering to be models. So excited!
  • So. Much. Kissing! Making out is the best thing ever.
  • I love having people cook for me and this week two different men cooked me incredible dinners. One was raw tacos, spicy and sensuously eaten. The other was oysters, salmon, shitakes, and peppers off the grill, served lakeside with raspberries in champagne. This totally gets me going!
  • MarksI learned about fire cupping, leaving many large dark circles on my front and back. (I’ve been told either I look like I was attacked by a hentai octopus or like an angel whose wings have been removed.)  Cupping was an excellent starting place for an erotic adventure.
  • Got the best spanking of my life from an experienced Daddy. I totally pushed the limits of what I thought I would be able to handle. My ass is black and blue. It made me want a fucking in the best way.
  • I spent one full moon evening naked with a group of people I care about while we tried to slap away mosquitos. I got to be their gender fluid hoser. No really, I sprayed them down with a garden hose! I also inherited a huge box of dongs. The jokes write themselves.
  • If you are open-minded about your definition of sex (and I am), I had sex an astonishing 9 times in 7 days: Four interesting and passionate partners, once by myself. Sometimes quick and dirty, once deep into the night in every position, three times in the shower until the water went cold. Four penis-in-vagina instances, more often making love with mouths and hands. Twice no one orgasmed (but it felt fantastic), three times only I came, and four times it was an all-skate. Every single time felt intimate and connective.

That’s right, I’m bragging about how great my sex life is. Actually, my whole life is awesome. Sometimes when I have a lot of sex I begin to feel out of balance, like I can’t sustain the pace and I might crash. It isn’t like that at all right now. I feel very grounded and balanced and good! I’m just needing to find more time in my schedule to write. I have so much to write about, but it’s happening faster than I have time to write.  I can’t wait to see what happens next!

 

Mar 092014
 

FlirtIt’s too bad that I don’t have a fetish for dirty linens because that’s what we faced when we arrived at our rental cabin – nothing had been cleaned. Dirty towels sat piled at the foot of the bed, which was rumpled and obviously not fresh. The thermostat said it was 50 degrees. It was late at night and Harold and I had driven for miles to get there. Not to be discouraged, we tossed everything into the wash, turned on the heat, and snuggled up on the couch.

I had gloried in fantasies of what we would do when we arrived, what manner of depravity I would inflict on Harold. I had lovingly packed our toy bag with needle-play paraphernalia and an assortment of rope. Harold’s breath caught in his throat when I told him of my plans to take him – I would tie him up, blindfold him, put in earbuds with a special playlist, overload his senses, bring him to the edge of orgasm over and over, put needles in sensitive places, come on his face while he was helpless…

But it wasn’t to be. At least not that night. It’s funny how things work. I have such an active fantasy life. Being able to imagine pleasure is awesome, as long as I don’t get too hung up on things happening exactly as envisioned. I’ve learned to trust my instincts. Going with the flow of erotic energy is always very rewarding.

When we woke up the next morning, the attraction between us was practically magnetic. We don’t wake up in bed together very often so it felt kind of amazing, maybe like waking up next to your favorite movie star crush. We smiled and gazed at one another in adoration. The room was still cool, but we explored each other’s bodies under the safety of three comforters. He tied me to the bed.

By the windowI’m not sure how we manage to know each other so well and still surprise each other with the things we do in bed. Harold can bring me to orgasm in minutes. He knows exactly how much pressure to apply and where. He knows when to tweak a nipple hard or how to make me beg for the vibrator. This time, I asked him to talk dirty to me (not a usual request) and he knew exactly what I wanted to hear, how to make me come hard around his fingers with his words and conjured images. I am lucky to have this experienced lover who is happy to excite me with new experiences.

Of course, it goes both ways. I meant to draw out the erotic sensations of sexual bonding as much as possible, but sometimes fucking just feels too good. I was just going to tease a little with penetration. We moved between positions and I stayed in control, not letting either of us climax, until he got behind me. I love being fucked doggy-style. This time I even had the vibrator on my clitoris. I knew I was fast approaching orgasm and I was beyond caring. Harold told me he was about to come, but by the time I was able to process that information, I was spasming around his cock and then he lost control.

It’s difficult to feel disappointed in an orgasm like that. I am always amazed at how powerful it is to peak together. I expressed some regret over not being able to torment him more and he said, “You could milk me into my mouth.” Uhhh…what? He explained that I could massage what was left of his ejaculate out of his prostate and into his open mouth. Like he would rest on his shoulders with his knees near his ears. And catch his own jism.

!!!!!!!!!

I love my life. We waited a bit. We ate breakfast. I painted his nails purple. We took a shower together. Always, we talk and talk. He gave himself an enema. I tied off his balls and we played around with some ball torment.

ReflectionWhen it felt right, I told him to get his ass in the air. It took a bit of positioning, with a pillow behind his shoulders, but Harold is flexible enough to position his cock over his face. (Have I mentioned how hot that is?) That left his asshole vulnerable to my lubed finger.

I enjoy prostate stimulation very much. Harold obviously gets pleasure out of what I do – just a firm stroke with a slightly curled finger. I have milked the semen out of him before. It makes me feel powerful to take his seed without granting an orgasm, but one of my favorite things is bring him to orgasm while doing prostate massage. What we did yesterday was like the best kind of sexual circus acts.

As I stroked Harold’s prostate, big fat drops of semen fell and he caught them in his mouth! Best trick ever. I wondered if he would be grossed out or humiliated, but he wasn’t. He sometimes longs for a boyfriend to go down on. If it were possible for me to love him more, I would!

Milking into his mouthWe managed to fill the weekend with more sex and good times. I may have come enough in the past couple of days to make up for how sparse things have been in the past few weeks, but as much as my pleasure is a priority for me, Harold’s trick of coming into his own mouth totally wins as my favorite moment of the weekend. Things may not have turned out the way I hoped they would – I think the mischief we came up with was better!

Jan 122014
 

FundamentHarold tells me that “fundament” is a nice medieval word for the asshole. It’s making me giggle, especially since we’ve been revisiting a few of our anal-play explorations, or “fundamentals.” Over the years we’ve tried a lot of things. Some of them were total flops and some were so successful that we integrated them into our standard practices. The rest, the ones that landed somewhere in the middle, were often pretty good, but for whatever reason, we didn’t do it again. Well, lately we’ve been thinking… What about putting ginger in our arses again? Where is that awesome butt plug with the tail? Why did we stop doing electrosex?

Opening up old experiments for further exploration is fun, kind of like visiting friends you haven’t seen for ages. The fact the Harold and I have stories from our first adventures with each of these things just adds to our pleasure. There may be a thrill over trying something new, but additional play lets you go deeper.

Figging

Bottom in laceIn April of 2011, we published two posts on figging (lab and results) that have definitely been one of our most popular topics ever on the site. We wrote our figging information in a very tongue-in-cheek quasi-academic science-lab format, complete with a downloadable lab result form. I’m not sure that anyone got that we were joking. Despite our silliness, we were serious about sticking fingers of ginger into our bottoms. We’ve tried this experiment a couple of times, but not for a number of years now. When I repeatedly found myself daydreaming over large hands of ginger at the grocery store, I figured we might as well give it another go.

In my original research, I read that peeling and preparing the ginger fig a day ahead of using it would increase the potency. I am eternally curious, so I had to give that a try. The day before a date with Harold, I carefully selected two segments of ginger. When I was done they each looked like a crooked finger. I put them in a ziplock bag in the fridge for about 30 hours.

We only occasionally play with my ass, so it was exciting to prepare for the fig. At first I didn’t notice anything but the increased pressure of having something in my anus. Then it started to burn. It wasn’t uncomfortable, more like heat. My ass and genitals felt hot. It’s intense in a good way. I came in about 3 seconds with the vibrator. It was similar with Harold. I’d hoped to be able to apply prostate pressure with the fig, but it didn’t really matter. He was hard and ready to go. We fucked, but the heat and arousal made it fairly quick and intense. Preparing the fig ahead of time does increase the effect. And I still think there is a sort of psychoactive effect to having ginger in your bum.

Figging is totally cool. We would probably use ginger more often in our anal play, but I’m not always good at preparing ahead. I’m currently seeing how long a ginger fig can sit in the fridge before drying out or going bad. Maybe I can just always have one ready!

Crystal Minx Tail Plug

Minx TailA couple of years ago we wrote a review of a pyrex butt plug that had a real fur tail attached. It was given to me by a very cool company called Crystal Delights, which has since expanded in several incredible directions (check out these Kitty plugsReignbow Pony tailsbunny tails, and gorgeous glass dildoes). Wearing this fur tail was a very unique sexual experience for us. Feeling your tail brush the backs of your legs is very sensuous and arousing in a primal way, but for some reason, the tail got set aside at some point and we kind of forgot about it. Until recently…

Last month there was an occasion when I really wanted some sort of anal stimulation and what Harold came up with was the tail plug. We were also doing some power-play, where Harold was Topping me, so this was an interesting layer to add to the energy mix. Wearing the tail while being bound and spanked was super hot! Now I just have to figure out how to keep my tail out of the way.

In my original review, I was obviously worried about being branded a Furry. I have matured since then and could not care less. Wearing that tail is wild, sexy fun – truly fundamental.

Electrosex

Oh yeah, now I remember why we stopped playing with e-stim – it was that time I had Harold all wired up and he ended up coming blood. It was the sound in his penis and not the electroplay that caused the bleeding, but I still have a strong association. If I recall correctly, though, electrosex was getting pretty interesting before that.

My experience of using electricity sexually is that you have to be intelligent about it (take your brain with you while you are playing) and that it leads to creativity and making stuff. Also, there is not enough information out there about what to do or how to play safely. I find that I have no trouble running current through Harold in a way that is sexy for him, but I still have yet to figure out anything that is more than mildly interesting for me.

Santa brought me a new TENS unit, presumably because I’ve been very bad. I’m sure he meant for me to use it on my neck pain, right? The instructions are in Chinese and it plays a cute little melody when you turn it on. It can handle six leads and it has more power than the old unit. Based on recent experience, I can tell you that it works very well to torture balls.

From behindE-stim seems to work best anally, perhaps because it’s easy to stick something conductive into your bum. Harold just made an anal probe out of copper plumbing bits. I’m excited to see what we can come up with in the future, using the conductive self-adhesive tape we found on the internet! I’m planning on wiring up a couple of our favorite anal toys and maybe a dildo or two.

Fundamentals

I can’t say if figging, the fur tail butt plug, and the electrosex experimentations will continue to be a thing. Our sex life is always evolving and expanding. We follow our desires. If it continues to have heat, we’ll keep doing it, but I’m sure that we’ll keep playing with our assholes. That’s fundamental.

Nov 192013
 

EvoëSometimes I want so much for Harold to take me. I love the safety we’ve created in our relationship around consent and equality, but every once in a while I deeply long for him to take my submission. It consumes me at times. I enjoy Topping him and all of the ways we connect, but it frustrates me to no end to have this particular part of my sexuality go ignored.

Perhaps I can’t expect one person to meet all my needs. It’s just that…we are so good together. He knows me so well. I can’t help having my feelings hurt. It feels like a rejection, or at the very best, that part of me is invisible to him.

We keep talking about my fantasies. It gets harder and harder for me to articulate my emotions and desires. My fear of rejection makes me anticipate it – maybe even create it. I want Harold to Top me so badly it’s like an ache in my throat, a pounding in my chest. The wanting itself feels dangerous. I want him to play with that energy, make the longing sexually charged, give me a container in which to come undone. I am so strong. It takes a strong person to persuade me to let go.

Harold has that kind of strength, but what I want him to do is alien to his nature. I don’t know how to teach him to Top me. I can get him to do Topping type activities: bondage, flogging, needle play, and the like. But what about the energy? How do I show him what I want emotionally?

As a strong empowered woman, I feel some embarrassment around wanting to be dominated. As a survivor of abuse, I feel some shame around wanting to be in a position that sometimes reminds me of being a victim. As an active partner in this relationship, I feel guilty for wanting to change our power balance, even temporarily. It makes everything come out sideways. How can I want something so much and not be able to speak clearly about it? It hurts so much.

When we talk about him being dominant, it turns me on. I have a thrill of excitement and danger similar to being on a roller coaster. I want this sooooo bad. I’ve had this feeling all morning as I think about our date today. This is a delicate balancing act for me. If I don’t keep the energy sexual and positive it turns into something closer to anxiety and squicky discomfort. I’ve been trying to manage the energy myself, but eventually had to check in with Harold.

He doesn’t understand and I don’t have the skill to try to show him. We are so good about everything else. Why does this particular fetish render me senseless? I want him. I want him to take me. I am here trying to keep this possibility open, but I feel crushed. Has he already rejected me? Will he find me in the place where I want to give myself? I’ll know in an hour.

Nov 172013
 

My hands are bound. My soul is laid bare. This cage you keep me in is the the arena of our desire. I am yours – utterly, completely, totally. I like to struggle. I enjoy the frustration of your teasing touch. I am breathless, wondering what you will do to me.

Caged

We have built a web, strand by strand, kiss by kiss, and I wait for you at the center. I like the anticipation of knowing you are coming, my mate, my friend. I will let you sneak up on me, then perhaps I will devour you.

inside the web

I am your canvas. Trace your vision across my flesh. There is art in every charged touch of your hand, every flick of your wicked tongue, every slow thrust of your hips. Teach me to dance and release me from this cage.

Teach me to fly

 

 

See what other people are doing for Sinful Sunday…

Sinful Sunday

Nov 012013
 

Beautiful morningA few days ago Harold (my partner in life, love, and hare-brained scheming) turned 65.  He’s not much for celebrating, but we wanted to do something special. Of course we wanted to make love, but what else? We couldn’t think of just the right thing until the day before. I don’t remember now, how tattoos came up. Initially it was sort of a dare or a jest, then we started talking about tattoos as a form of submission to each other – how cool it would be to channel the energy of pain and excitement into sexual energy.

What if I gave my pain to him while I was being marked by his symbol? What if he actually brought me to orgasm while I was being tattooed? We were intrigued by the possibilities, but neither of us was sure there was a permanent mark we were willing to take on. We had feverish conversations throughout the eve of his birthday. Optimistically I made us an appointment.

The next morning we got together early. I wanted to shower and spend some time connecting, so I started up some Janis Joplin and both of us squeezed into a shower clearly made for one. I adore hot water and slick soapy skin. Things were starting to heat up.

With his cock hard in my hand, I asked Harold what he wanted sexually. Like normal, he temporized, telling me to just go with what I felt was right. I’ve been pushing him more to think about and vocalize the things he desires, so I didn’t let him off the hook.

Going downHe began to talk about me punishing him somehow. I was in an excited sexy place, so it took me a few minutes to realize that the energy had changed between us. It stopped feeling sexy. I immediately centered myself and opened up to Harold. I sat him down on the toilet seat and straddled him, wrapping my arms around him. I could feel some pain from his childhood there – something that I had triggered when we fought  last week. We talked through it until it felt okay for us both. We do this kind of thing a lot and it makes for much better sex.

We walked down to the cabin in the glorious morning sunshine, wearing only shoes and coats. The chill air on my thighs and the thrill of being naked outdoors started to make me wet. There was already a fire going in the cabin. We proceeded to have some of the hottest sex we’ve had in a long time. He went down on me until I came. I strung him up in cuffs and did wicked things to his nipples and balls. I pushed him more than I ever have before and we both reached new heights.

IMG_3613When neither of us could wait another second, I bent over in front of him and let him fuck me from behind, his arms still suspended above his head. This is one of my favorite positions. I bent over the bed, where I had all of my tools spread out. He pounded into me. I rocked forward with each thrust, my breath coming out in harsh gasps, escalating to full throated moans, followed shortly by Harold’s ecstatic bellows.

Evidently my head was bumping my phone in the final throes of Harold’s birthday sex and Siri heard our vocalizations. Her voice surprised us, “I do not understand ‘who, who, who, who.’ I could search the Internet for you.” I laughed hysterically when I figured out what was going on.

From there we drove to to get tattoos, anticipation and anxiety sharing equal space. We knew what we wanted but we weren’t sure where. We talked through the positives and negatives of every possible location. Eventually we went with what felt right for each of us.

Harold and his tattooHarold went first. You have to understand that he’s never wanted a tattoo before. The fact that he celebrated turning 65 by getting his first tattoo is very inspirational to me. I think he enjoyed the process. He got spacey in a charming way, holding my hand. Afterwards, he was proud and blissed out. I love him so much.

This was not my first dance, but I was shocked by how intense the pain was in the tender flesh of my upper stomach. It got better over time, but initially there was no way that I could have sexualized that sensation. I’m just not a masochist. What I did do, over and over, was send the energy to Harold, giving him my pain, taking his mark. He held my hand and touched my face.

After, we were so high on endorphins. I felt amazing. We had so much fun.

We went home to my darling husband, who had prepared an incredible and gorgeous conch and squid ceviche just for Harold. Joel had even managed to find Harold’s favorite alcoholic beverage, Punt è Mes, which is rare in these parts. (Have I mentioned that sometimes it is unbelievably awesome to have two partners who care about each other?) The children had all made birthday cards and gotten him flowers. More glowy happiness!

Heart and delta tattooHarold spent some time talking with his wife and I put the kids to bed. We fell into each other’s arms and the softness of bed. Tired happiness gave way to gentle kisses. deep probing kisses became grinding gyrations. Without any thought we were making love again. Happy birthday Baby and many more…

Oct 062013
 

Adv Couple's Guide to Sex Toys 2eBook: “The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Sex Toys”
Written by: Violet Blue
Foreword by: Dr. Charlie Glickman
Published by: Cleis Press

We dare you to read this book.

Are you scared to ask your partner to try the kinky things you fantasize about? Or maybe you are at the other end of the spectrum – you think that together you’ve tried all of the sex toys? Then we double dare you to read Violet Blue’s new book, “The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Sex Toys.” Whether you’ve never even broached the subject of sex toys or you’re getting bored in the bedroom, we think you can use this guide to find some inspiration.

We’re pretty adventurous. Collectively, we have over 60 years of experience making, buying, and using sex toys. While we try to be as safe as possible, there have been some misadventures, so the first thing that we noticed about ”The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Sex Toys” was Blue’s well informed safety tips. Important information is covered clearly and often highlighted in a boxout, making it easy to access. We wish that there had been a book like this when we were first looking at sex toys!

Countless people have told us stories of shame that made it impossible to ask their partner for what they really want. It drives us crazy because we believe that everyone deserves to have a fulfilling sex life. Well! We now have a resource to recommend to those people. ”The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Sex Toys” doesn’t have all of the answers, but it focuses on good communication and offers some concrete suggestions for starting the sex toy conversation or surprising your lover with a toy (hint: surprise is not always a good idea). Blue’s personality shines through her writing, putting you at ease like you were having coffee with your sex smart best friend. There is no shame here, only fascinating data meant to empower you.

Our biggest criticism of the book is that it’s fairly heteronormative. While Blue has been very inclusive of all people, the book largely addresses straight couples. The chapter on strap-on sex has some great information about introducing men to anal play, but nothing about women playing together. Most of the material is presented in an unbiased fashion, but we found the overall assumption tended toward heterosexual couples. A minor thing of note: we found some of the language a bit forced or awkward from time to time, but it doesn’t interfere too much.

We loved pretty much everything else: the brightly colored cover, the highly accurate illustrations by Zanne DeJanvier, the foreword written by Charlie Glickman, PhD, and a whole chapter on resources for acquiring good sex toys. We appreciate Blue’s candor in naming names when talking about products she believes in. ”The Adventurous Couple’s Guide” bravely covers the gamut of sex toys: vibrators, butt plugs and other anal toys, dildos, strap-on harnesses, bondage, and nipple clamps. We were most excited to read about teledildonics (including webcam), sex machines, and sex furniture.

We found a lot of stuff in ”The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Sex Toys” that we have tried. What surprised us was how much new information there was. Well, maybe not new, but things we haven’t ever talked to each other about. We read the book separately, but when we compared notes we discovered that we shared a whole new realm of fantasy we have not yet explored. Just reading this book was a huge turn on – thinking about everything we’ve done and things we’d still love to do inspired some heavy sexting and at least one masturbation session. Without this book, we might never have shared with each other a mutual and intense interest in trying out a Monkey Rocker!

So, we dare you. We dare you to share this book with your lover.

~Evoë  & Harold

Oct 012013
 

Wrapped in a sheetHave you wondered what it would feel like to make love for hours on end? Could you take sex to such a sacred level that everything you do together is about sustained attraction and pleasure? Could you open your heart and let your partner flow through you?

We had 40 hours alone together in an alpine chalet. We made love for every minute of it, so happy to share company, so enraptured by each other’s pleasure, that everything we did was infused with love. Every time we are together we create a bond that goes deeper.

We made love for 40 hours, holed up in a tiny rundown a-frame. I said “made love”, not fucked, although we did lots of fucking. No, I mean we created love between us. We slept wrapped in each other’s arms, breathing in the scent of our sweat on each other’s skin. We slept in blissful golden safety.

When we woke in the morning, our desire peaked. The river rushed by our window and we simply merged – his mouth driving me wild, fingers inside me, my orgasm stretching out, taking his proud erection in my mouth.  We paused as he entered me. Is this what we wanted? We had all day…

Almost thereBut I’m all for taking pleasure in the moment. We never know what will come. No regrets, fuck now and hope fore more later. We fucked and the sweetness built between us. He filled me with his jism.

For 40 hours we made love with every action. We nibbled on finger foods, drank orange juice and coffee. I feel loved when I am fed. He shows love by providing for me. Food is such a sensual joy when we take time to enjoy it.

I meditated on the bed, feeling his presence strong beside me. I spiraled deep inside myself, seeing everything laid out before me. Anchored by his love, I healed parts of me that had been broken. Stretched out beside his warm body, I experienced a clarity that is often elusive. When I opened my eyes to his smile, I knew he could feel it too.

We cuddled in the hot tub, rain pouring down, but the mountains gorgeous around us. I couldn’t keep my fingers from his skin. I watched his lips when he talked, needing to kiss them.

We surrounded ourselves in music, filling the small space with rhythms and lyrics that conjured up our past, times before we were together and since our lives have slowly grown together. Sometimes the music felt like it was my whole being and sometimes it was the backdrop of our conversation. We danced.

Harold made upI laid him out in front of the gas fireplace. Naked in a nest of blankets and pillows on the floor, I sat on his hips and made up his face. Touching a lover’s face is one of the most intimate things I can imagine and I loved making him my art. I was conscious of my cunt moist against his semi-erect cock, but I was intent on applying eyeliner. He never looks effeminate in make-up, it’s more that his fey nature shines through.

Talking seamlessly moved into oral sex and back. I hovered on the edge of orgasm. We fucked in spurts, laced with making out and kinky bits. I spanked him with a hairbrush, but it was my soft caresses that made him cry. We made love before and after eating, in and out of the hot tub, all over the cabin. Always, we stopped short of coming, letting our energy build.

We tumbled into bed, a bit sore, yet still full of need. A storm raged outside and the power went out, plunging us into total darkness. I felt afraid and slept holding his hand, a flashlight clutched in the other. There was a kind of isolation in that darkness, like being wrapped in a cocoon, but in some way we were still making love. It was just the two of us, far away from the rest of the world.

In the morning, he pampered me – an array of breakfast delights, my vibrator, and kisses all over. I finally found release with the help of his hands and it was incredibly sweet. I took over and spent some time focused on his body. It’s such a gift to have him give himself to me like that.

End of the weekendWe talked more in the hot tub. He broke through some wall I didn’t know was there. One moment we were drying off and the next I was crouched on the floor sobbing. He wrapped his whole body around me and held me while grief thundered out of me. I dripped snot into his hair.

We cleaned up and left. It wasn’t nearly enough, it’s never enough, but we so desperately need these times to connect with each other. We had 40 hours together in a run-down a-frame and we made every second count. What I know is that every second always counts. I want to make love every moment because I don’t know how much time we’ll have together in this world, but the love we make is real and will stay with me forever.

 

Jun 192013
 

Breast tie portraitFunny how things stop seeming kinky when I do them all the time. Squeezing Harold’s balls seemed shockingly, outrageously, horrifyingly kinky when he first proposed it to me. Now I knead his testicles pretty much any time we are sexual together. It has become normal. In fact, I would say that we hardly ever do anything kinky any more, but I know that other people think we do. I am beginning to see how the definition of kink would change from person to person and even for the same individual over time.

Today we did something that felt kinky. Actually, a couple of things – we tied up my breasts and filled my cunt with chain. That added edge of knowing that I’m doing something that pushes my boundaries is so sexy! I find that there is a fine line between hot and not when working with kink, so communication becomes super important. I need to be able to let my partner know when things feel more uncomfortable than provocative, but hovering between the two can really turn me on.

I’ve had my breasts tied up before, but it didn’t do very much for me, other than seem weird. For some reason, it was just the right thing to do today. I tied them myself, bending over at the waist and wrapping each breast tightly, crossing over in the middle. The effect was to make my breasts firmer and to stick out more. Having all that blood trapped made my skin so sensitive. Harold couldn’t stop stroking and tweaking. Every touch sent a rush of heat to my cunt.

Tied and happyIt was pretty easy to bring me to orgasm the first time. Wow. I might have been able to orgasm with breast stimulation alone, but we added oral sex and then a vibrator. I came so hard with Harold’s hands on my breasts! As the sensations subsided, the ropes around my chest suddenly didn’t feel right any more. My breasts were also turning blue. It was time to unwind the binding, but I was still pretty turned on.

After such an amazing orgasm, I was wet and I wanted something inside me. Our backpack of sex toys yielded up a length of chain that we have tried vaginally a couple of times. (You can read about it here.) Basically, we didn’t start until I was warmed up and we used a lot of lubricant to insert the chain, one smooth link at a time.

Initially, the only sensation was Harold’s fingers pushing the chain into my vagina. Then involuntary spasms of pleasure would clench my internal muscles around the chain and the resistance would make me spasm all over again. I started experiencing a feeling of fullness and the links started to feel pinchy going in and we halted there. (I’m getting good at stopping before things get uncomfortable!)

I can’t describe what it’s like to have my cunt full of chain. Physically, there is a sense of heaviness or fullness that is both comforting and erotic. Intellectually, although I know that we are doing this as safely as possible, chain registers on my danger meter. There is some part of me wondering what the hell I’m doing. Isn’t it just plain wrong to put foreign objects in your cootchie? Emotionally, I take all of the raw sexual energy of those thoughts and transform it all into blindingly hot sex.

SensationsI don’t know how else to explain. I was nearly coming the whole time Harold was inserting chain. Once it was in, I used a vibrator on my clit and orgasmed right away. Harold slowly pulled the chain out (about 5 feet worth) as I came and the orgasm lasted the entire time and then some. Having chain in my cunt is the most fabulous thing ever. And it’s kinky (for the moment).