I’m skeptical of reviews done by people who don’t have the proper equipment to evaluate the product – for example, me reviewing the JackStrap, a device meant to help people in possession of a cock and balls to get off. I do not biologically possess a set of cock and balls. But here’s the thing, I approach sex like science. When I’m testing out a new product, I’m collecting data. I always try something several times before I review it, collecting as much information as possible, and lucky for me, I have two guys – so I can get both of them to try a penis-oriented product.
Jack Strap was sent to me by Ntimate, the same company that made the ingenious FleshWrap. I am eager to try out everything they can come up with based on my experience of FleshWrap. But what does the JackStrap do? From their website, “This simple silicone strap loosely connects your balls to the fingers you wrap around your cock. So, every stroke of your cock now also tugs and bounces your nuts.” Is this a good thing?
I rely on my guys to give me good information about penis-oriented things, like jacking off and the things they might do on their own to get off. Joel and Harold both confessed that sometimes it feels good to get some ball-bouncing action going, which is what Jack Strap is all about. Harold enjoys rough play with his balls, Joel is extremely sensitive and generally doesn’t like me to touch his balls.
It was Joel that tried JackStrap first. It really is a simple silicone strap with loops at either end. We struggled for a while to get his balls into the round opening, but he felt very cautious about pulling his scrotum through. I wrote to the company saying that we couldn’t get him in it, even with lube. The CEO of Ntimate, Jack Campbell, emailed me back himself:
Hmmm… That’s odd, as the JackStrap is stretchy enough to go around a 16 oz. drinking glass.
The procedure is to put both sets of fingers (both hands) into the larger round hole and pull them apart, and stretch the bejesus out of the JackStrap opening. Pull your hand maybe 4-inches (100mm) or so apart, creating an opening much, much larger than the target scrotum. Then while holding it that way, put it over the balls, and slip your finger out.
The point is that you cannot hurt or break the JackStrap by tugging it WAYYY open. And, a delicate approach is not best. Be aggressive. Grab the thing, slip all your fingers into the hole, pull it apart between your hands like you’re trying to break it, and just yank it wide freaking open.”
I gotta love a CEO who gives that kind of advice! Unfortunately, Joel wouldn’t let me near his junk again with the JackStrap, so I had to try it on Harold.
Harold I can be quite rough with and he had no problems getting JackStrap over his balls. His problem with JackStrap is that, sadly, he is not hung like a porn star. His penis is of average size and the finger holes for JackStrap hit much higher than the place he would normally hold his cock for beating off. Having too much give in the strap means that there is no ball-bouncing. It just didn’t really work.
Both of my test subjects said that, while the concept of JackStrap is good, there’s not really a lot of point in purchasing an item to do what they’ve already worked out ways of doing when it feels like the thing. They demonstrated masturbation techniques that elicited results similar to what JackStrap purports to do. My guess is that most men who would be interested, already have their method as well.
My conclusion to this science experiment? Based on my sample of two, JackStrap is not the ingenious device that FleshWrap is. It’s probably not worth shelling out the bucks for. But I have to rave about the company. Ntimate is an up and coming name in the sex toy industry, creating innovative products for men. Their customer service rocks my socks and I can’t wait to see what they do next.
Bottom line: unless you are a porn star who wants to jiggle and bounce your balls, wait for Ntimate’s next big breakthrough.
Grade: C-
Related links:
- Review: My Hand
- Review: FleshWrap
- Review: Ophoria v-ring
- Review: Tenga Eggs
- A trampling table for me
- The bondage chair
My first thought was that it looked like a giant crochet hook. My second, that it was very pink. Followed by, how quickly can I get this thing out of the package? I’ve been hearing great things about the toyfriend line for a while, so when Babeland sent me the toyfriend Starlet, I was pretty excited. The Starlet is an impressive package.
At 6.5 inches long and 1.25 inches diameter, this vibrator is just about my perfect size for internal use. With the broad flat, angled head, I believe that this is meant to be a g-spot toy. The slogan on the box seems to support this: “I’m up and coming and oh so hot, my ambition will hit your spot.” Except that it doesn’t for me. I think that my anatomy is different from most people’s because generally, g-spot toys don’t hit my g-spot.
That’s okay though, because Starlet works wonders on the clitoris as well. I like the broad head because it spreads vibration over a distributed area, but the edges are great if you want pinpointed stimulation. This vibe has 5 simple settings – 2 solid speeds (but I can’t tell the difference between them) and 3 patterns. I found all of the settings to be a bit buzzy against my clit. I quickly felt so sensitive that I had to move the vibrator away, but still managed to come with some creative positioning.
Starlet comes with batteries, which totally wins toyfriend bonus points from me. I will say that the batteries only lasted through a few uses, leaving me dripping wet, clutching the Starlet and yelling down the stairs to Harold to please grab me two AAA batteries. I caught a lot of shit for that. Anyway, the base unscrews and the batteries slide in, easy as can be.
The single button is on the bottom, making it straightforward to turn on and rotate through the settings. Turning Starlet off is as simple as holding the button down for 2 seconds. My only problem was that when I was using the vibe internally and trying to get a good position, I kept turning it off accidentally.
This vibe is made of high quality silicone. It’s hard and soft and smooth, except for the stamped in logo taking up about 2 inches on one side (I didn’t feel it when in use). I love that Starlet doesn’t pick up lint or anything. It’s totally easy to wash and care for, since it’s waterproof (I’ve used mine in tub and shower). Oh, and water-based lube is going to be best for this toy.
I generally like fairly quiet vibrators because it’s nobody’s business what I’m up to. I would say this one is medium to quiet. You can hear it over the shower noise, but not from the next room with the door open. It’s still kinda noisy, but I find it acceptable for my needs.
One of my favorite things about toyfriend is that they have little plastic stands that come with their vibes. I love that my Starlet can be stored or displayed standing up. You could collect the whole line and display them on your mantle like you are the winner of some erotic awards. Or it could simply decorate your bedside table and be right at your fingertips when in need. Mine is actually going to live in my shower.
There are a few downsides: I don’t like the color (toyfriend can call it magenta all they want, it’s still pink). It’s not a good toy for anal play. It doesn’t hit my g-spot, even though it feels nice inside my cunt. It can be difficult for me to orgasm using it, but generally when used in conjunction with other things, it’s a nice addition.
Although this isn’t a vibe that stands out in the sea of sex toys, there are some things I really like about Starlet: the size and shape is really good. I can get adequate depth and the flat surface of the head feels great on my clit. It’s high quality. I appreciate the construction and material of this vibe. The vibration patterns are actually effective. This is probably the first vibrator I’ve used where the special vibration patterns did anything for me.
Bottom line: probably a great first vibrator.
Grade: B
Other posts you might enjoy:
- Review: My Hand
- Review: Crave Duet
- Review: Silicone Jack Rabbit
- Water-based lubes from lousy to lubricious
- Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator
- We-Vibe
After months of trying to figure out how to gush like a porn star, I managed to ejaculate! I’m one of those people that can’t stand not being able to do whatever I set my mind to. I’ve heard that not everyone can ejaculate, but I didn’t let months of attempting to squirt unsuccessfully stop me. And now? I totally rocked it!
Female ejaculation is apparently a mysterious thing – at least for people who are still debating whether or not a g-spot exists. No one seems to know what exactly gets ejaculated or from where. Current theory says that there is a gland near the g-spot similar to the prostate that secretes clear fluid. There are some great books and workshops that I’ve seen about the g-spot and female ejaculation, but I have to confess that I’ve relied on internet research for my information. And porn, of course.
It’s so cool to watch women gush. Years ago I had a girlfriend who would soak the fucking bed and I thought it was awesome. Why should cocks have all the fun? Pussies can proudly jizz too. I think that part of my desire to fountain is that no matter how earth-shattering my orgasm is, my partner still peers at me with concern and inquires if I’ve come. Baby, if I spray your face you’re going to KNOW that I came. Female ejaculation is visually and experientially impressive.
Gushing is like fisting – it’s about taking your time and feeling your body. It helps to have a partner who is into spending some time giving you pleasure. It’s also about opening up, relaxing, being in the moment. I tend to be kind of results driven, so it’s not always easy to be in that space, but we finally made it work.
I read that the easiest way to squirt was to stimulate the g-spot until that whole area becomes engorged, then to bear down as the feeling of orgasm approached. It helps to have your partner remove their hand, or toy, or cock. For me, this is difficult because when I am about to come I pull in, as though I am performing an extended kegel. I also tend to orgasm fairly quickly and we found that it took a while of massaging the g-spot to be ready. I had a couple of regular orgasms before I squirted.
I’d also heard that preparing to squirt feels like you need to pee. It wasn’t really like that for me, but I can see where that comes from. I guess that many women stop as soon as they feel like urinating because they don’t want to pee on their partner. I figure that if I am already trying to soak him, it makes little difference, but to be honest, it totally wasn’t like that.
We just took our time. I got over my worries that he would get bored and simply enjoyed the sensations. I started to feel warmer around my g-spot and more sensitive. It felt amazing! I used a vibrator on my clit. After what seemed like a long time, but was probably about 20 minutes (Harold’s wrist was just starting to get sore), I felt a kind of pressure building up. I focused on bearing down with my cunt. It felt totally counter intuitive and I really had to think about it. When I felt like I was going to come I told Harold, he moved his hand back, and I squirted!
The jet sprayed only a few inches beyond my cunt, not the fountain I had fantasized about, but it was a success! Harold got really excited. It was kind of anti-climactic (literally!) for me. It didn’t feel like an orgasm. In fact, I couldn’t even tell that anything had happened. I wasn’t excited until Harold showed me the big wet spot that I had created. I squirted!
The scientist in me can’t wait to try again. Can I duplicate my results? Will prolonged stimulation of the g-spot result in a more forceful ejaculation? Can I get myself to gush using toys? Can I repeat the experiment and have it feel more like an orgasm? I’m so excited to find out now that I finally squirted!
The mermaid swam faster, golden peals of laughter tumbling over her shoulder as she gauged her lead on the octopus chasing her. The massive cephalopod was gaining, tentacles propelling him closer! Too late, she turned to find a large rock looming directly in front of her. She was trapped! She turned to face her pursuer, breathless with expectation. He pinned her to the rock with several strong arms. Tentacles curled tenderly around each of her nipples and his beak found the spot that made her scream in ecstasy every time. Just as her octopus lover brought her to the edge, tentacles slipped inside her mouth and cunt, filling her completely…
If you’ve ever had tentacle fantasies, Babeland has a dildo for you – Pipedream’s Icicles No. 24, aka Octopussy. The Icicles line is all hand blown glass “massagers” in a variety of shapes and sizes. No. 24 is a scintillatingly crafted, elegantly curved and pseudo suction-cupped tentacle. It’s a very fetching and entirely appropriate shade of pink. This dildo is beautiful and brilliant!
I confess to being a bit intimidated by Octopussy at first. It’s girth and extreme texture made me worry about comfort, but with a bit of lube, everything was fine. I found the bumps and textures to be quite pleasant. The playful loop of the tentacled tip makes for a useful handle when thrusting. The length is perfect for me, but the curve is not quite right to hit my g-spot.
This is a blown glass toy, so everything is smooth. In fact, it feels great. I love glass – I like the weight and heft of it, the beauty of it, and how easy it is to clean up. Just soap and water, or even the top of the dishwasher. The best part about glass is that you can easily play with temperature, warming or cooling the toy to the desired level.
Hokusai, 1814
Octopussy’s biggest lure, however, is in the realm of fantasy. Women have contemplated tentacles as objects of lust for centuries. This Japanese erotic woodcut by Hokusai from 1814, called The Dream of the Fisherman’s Wife, depicts a female diver in the amorous embrace of two octopuses. Even Picasso painted erotic images of women and tentacled sea creatures. Modern art forms, from Hentai to sci-fi aliens, are exploring the erotic potential of cephalopods. If you’ve ever imagined yourself in the sexy grasp of a tentacle, perhaps this dildo can put the octopus in your pussy.
Bottom line: quality toy full of fantasy potential.
Grade: B
Other posts you might enjoy:
- Review: Fun Factory’s Amor
- Review: A Year of Sex
- Review: Glow-in-the-Dark Vibrating Emperor
- Ice
- Freak of the week
- Office supplies
I’ve reviewed so many sex toys that I thought perhaps it was time to go back to one of the classics, My Hand. My Hand came with the original package and has grown and evolved with my needs over the years. In some ways it is the ultimate sex toy, the thing that all sex toys attempt to do better.
Versatility is really key with My Hand. Not only can My Hand be utilized to bring pleasure to myself, it can also be used with any of my partners! This amazing piece of equipment can replace a paddle, a vibrator, a dildo, a men’s masturbatory sleeve, a butt plug, and some nipple clamps. My Hand also feels amazing just skimming along the skin’s surface or digging in for deep massage.
I used to use My Hand to get myself off, but over time I’ve come to enjoy vibrators more. If My Hand has a flaw, it’s that I can’t get it to vibrate fast enough. Still, it’s always handy in a pinch. It’s very flexible and easy to position, always the right temperature, and usually just the right size. Regretfully, I am unable to reach my own g-spot with My Hand.
I can reach my girlfriend’s g-spot however. My Hand transmits an amazing amount of sensation. Having My Hand inside of her is one of my favorite things in life. I can also squeeze and tease her nipples with My Hand. My Hand is also quite useful with my men, especially around the cock and balls, where some digital manipulation is well received. My Hand is fantastic at squeezing, rubbing, and pumping. But that’s not all! My Hand also has some probing action – perfect for back-door play. In fact, nothing is better for prostate stimulation than My Hand. Impact play is a natural, of course. You can’t get any more basic than slapping and spanking.
There are times when My Hand does not have a long enough reach. I should point out, while the power supply is phenomenal (no batteries!), the energy is not infinite. My Hand does sometimes get tired and may even cramp. Also, it requires some upkeep. Mainly, nail trimming and moisturizing. My Hand is a snap to clean though – just use soap and warm water. And safer sex is smooth in a non-latex glove. I think My Hand looks suave and stylish in the black ones.
My Hand comes in a variety of colors, most of them perfectly suited to the owner – none of that terrible pink color that many sex toys come in. No sex toy can compete with the portability of My Hand (except perhaps My Tongue). My Hand won’t take up valuable luggage space or invite ridicule from TSA agents.
I just adore how subtle My Hand is. I use it every day in millions of ways, have it right out in plain sight, and no one would ever guess that I just had My Hand in my partner’s ass. It’s that great! I can shake hands at a business meeting and they would only know that I use My Hand to spank my partner if they read my blog. I love mixing it up like that, as though our bodies are just normal when we have sex. It’s so cool.
My Hand is way more than a sex toy. I use it to flip people off, write, pick my nose, scratch backs, and tie shoes. I’ve never had a dildo that could do all of that. No, My Hand is pretty fucking brilliant. And the best part is the low, low cost. Unless you’ve somehow lost the one you were born with (or managed to be born without one), My Hand is in your grasp right now.
Bottom line: don’t wave goodbye to the vibrator just yet, but give a round of applause to My Hand.
Grade: A-
Other posts you might enjoy:
- Review: Fun Factory’s Amor
- Review: njoy Fun Wand
- Lubricant update
- Prostate milking
- Water-based lubes from lousy to lubricious
- Five days of porn
Things are turning serious between my vibrator and me. We spend time together nearly every day. What started as a mere flirtation has deepened into somewhat more. It’s not that the Mystic Wand is epic. Nope, Mystic is steady, dependable, and knows just how to touch me right. We can bathe together, even tease Harold’s cock together. I’m living a dream.
I knew we’d crossed some kind of line when I started drifting off during our time together, entering that spiritual/meditative space that I normally only achieve with a partner. You know (I hope), that floaty place, where you are both more in your body than normal and also connected to everything in the universe. Pleasure is very easy for me there. I find that I play around with the vibrator, trying to draw out that feeling before I finally come.
Actually, as much as I love the Mystic, my new relationship isn’t with the vibrator. It’s with me. I’m learning to love and make love with myself. I’m learning that the special places I thought I could only 
reach in connection with someone else actually are mine, to have any time I want. It’s feeling so good to surrender myself and just trance out on sensuality for a bit. I feel happy and centered afterward.
I’m just learning to love myself. I’m currently working on releasing anger. My anger has typically ended up as self loathing when I couldn’t express it. Now I am opening up and I have discovered that a boatload of resentment has been impeding my ability and right to get off. You know what? This is my body and I will use the Mystic Wand as many times as I want. We’ve got something good going on.
This must be what they mean by cosmic vibrations.
Other posts you might enjoy:
- Lovemaking for one
- Review: Mystic Wand
- My fantasies are mine to explore
- Sometimes sex makes it all better
- If I masturbate am I abstinent?
What if your vibrator not only brought you to orgasm, but also made every single one of your orgasms more intense? Good, right? This is exactly what Jopen claims their new vibrator, Intensity, does for you. Intensity has several important features: an electro-stim kegel exerciser, an inflation pump, and vibrators for the g-spot and clitoris. Combined, these features make up the most comprehensive women’s sex toy I’ve ever seen. While Intensity is odd looking, it’s clearly designed with the user in mind.
It’s the electro stimulation that makes this “adult pleasure product” stand out. Story goes that Intensity arose out of the development of a medical device designed to help women strengthen their pelvic floor muscles. Age and childbirth can decrease pelvic muscle function, often causing incontinence, so such a device would already be quite valuable medically. Then women in their test group admitted that they were having intense orgasms, which happens because pelvic floor muscles are also partially responsible for the involuntary spasms that happen during orgasm. The medical team realized the erotic potential of their device and took it to Jopen. Intensity was born.
The shaft of Intensity has stimulation contacts on either side. When you turn the stimulation on, electrical currents cause the pelvic floor muscles to contract involuntarily – essentially exercising the muscles for you. It feels very strange, not at all unpleasant, but kind of like small punches or ripples inside the vagina. Intensity has 10 levels of electro-stim. I never made it past the 3rd level. That was plenty intense for me!
I have to confess that I find electrical play both scary and compelling. I have a bit of a medical fetish, so I’m drawn to anything that seems procedure-like. I really get off on Intensity in that way. But I’m terrified of shocking myself in a delicate area. The instructions for Intensity are very clear that you should not turn the power on until the shaft is inserted and make sure to turn the power off before removing the device in order to avoid electrical shock. Well, they don’t say it that way, but it’s what they mean.
Before inserting Intensity, they say to put the included Electrode Gel on the stimulation contacts. My supposition is that this is in order to increase conductivity. I used it the first couple of times and I was alarmed to feel how hot my vagina was getting. I thought that it was the electrical current. Turns out, their Electrode Gel contains parabens, and I react very badly to parabens. Yuck. I would recommend using your regular lube. The shaft is large and needs a bit of lube anyway. Harold and I ran experiments on the conductivity of various lubes with a multi-meter. Using the ohm setting we were unable to measure any conductivity in either the Electrode Gel or my favorite lube. In practice, my lube worked just as well – better since it didn’t burn.
Once you have Intensity lubed up, you can gently insert the shaft into the vagina. I found that I needed to lift the clitoral stimulator (the “bunny”) up and arrange it in a good place. Then comes my favorite part, pumping it up! The shaft expands inside the vagina in order to bring the stimulation contacts closer to skin. The accordianesque shape is weird and cool. I love this idea and I haven’t ever seen a sex toy that expands like Intensity. I really enjoy the feeling of fullness. The shaft deflates with a touch of a button, allowing for easy removal.
My experience was that electrical stimulation alone wasn’t enough to get me off. That’s why Jopen added vibration for both the clitoris and the g-spot. There are 5 levels of vibration. I tended to stay around the 3rd setting. It did seem to take some positioning to get the vibration just right. The clitoris stimulation tickles or buzzes more than the deep vibration that I tend to prefer, but I was able to orgasm most of the time.
There are several features of Intensity that I particularly admire. The control panel is perfect. It is actually oriented to the woman using it. The controls are angled so that I can see the buttons while I’m using the device. I know that seems like a small thing, but so many sex toys have inconvenient and non-intuitive controls! I appreciate that the power button is easy to access. Being able to turn the whole thing off with a single button is necessary because my orgasms were so intense that I needed Intensity to stop as soon as I started coming. Also, you never know when you might be interrupted. And I have that fear of being shocked. I also like that the electrical stimulation (marked S) and the vibration (marked V) are controlled independently. I wanted to explore the stimulation for a while before adding vibration. Another feature I like is the way the batteries are inserted: There’s a threaded plug like on a hot water bottle, which unscrews so that 4 AAA batteries can be inserted one at a time, positive end down. It’s an elegant, user-friendly design.
Intensity can be washed with soap and water or the toy cleaner of your choice. This is a toy that cannot be immersed in water, so I feel very cautious. Unfortunately, it is toy that get dirty very easily. The accordion folds of the pump trap lube and secretions and the silicone seems to pick up every bit of stray lint in the vicinity. It may be best to wash carefully both before and after each use.
This vibrator is pretty amazing. Intensity has some good things going for it. It turned me on, but it didn’t always get me off, I think because I wasn’t getting my brain involved in some fantasy to go with what my body was doing. I can’t say for sure if Intensity will improve all of my orgasms, but it makes sense that exercising the pelvic floor muscles this way could have health and sex benefits. Intensity is pricey at $250, but likely worth it for many people considering those potential benefits. I just wish it came in black – it totally doesn’t match my wardrobe or my bedroom.
Bottom line: interesting sex toy that has the potential to be life changing for women with weak pelvic floor muscles.
Grade: B+
You might also be interested in these posts:
- Review: Silicone Jack Rabbit
- Review: Mystic Wand
- Review: njoy Fun Wand
- Hot gay male porn
- Healthcare providers should be like lovers
The Love Diamond vibrator has rendered me speechless. Well nearly. When California Exotics sent me this vibrator, my first thought was that it’s the tackiest sex toy I’ve ever seen. But hey, tacky can be kind of fun in the right context, right? Still, I was taken aback by the shiny hot pink Barbie case and princess jewel. Clearly it’s designed to speak to a woman’s inner 3-year-old. Who knew you could get a vibrator to match your My Little Pony collection?
Actually, the clear soft portions of the vibrator let you see the inner mechanisms at work. I think that’s pretty cool. I like figuring out how things work. On the down side, those parts smelled and tasted funny, like chemicals, even after washing. I used a condom just to be careful about what I put in my body. My vagina is very sensitive. I also used lube because it’s a lot of toy to be introducing to my cunt without some warm up.
The awesome thing about this vibrator is that it is designed for maximum impact. There is a dildo-like shaft that rotates and is meant to be used internally to massage the g-spot and a 2″ long protrusion to tease the clitoris. There are 8 levels of rotation and 8 of vibration, as well as 3 functions of vibration and pulsation for both motors. The end result is 200 different combinations of vibration and pulsation plus rotation. But no matter how many combinations I tried, I couldn’t come at all.
It’s a fantastic idea, to stimulate both the g-spot and the clit at once. My favorite way to orgasm is with my partner’s fingers on my g-spot and a vibrator on my clit. It’s intense and feels great. I hoped that Love Diamond would be like that. I really tried. About 6 different times. I wonder if my anatomy is different from most women’s and that rendered Love Diamond ineffectual. The rotating tip certainly stirred me up, but didn’t seem to hit the right places. I also had troubles lining the teaser up for clitoral stimulation. The right angle eludes me.
Love Diamond did turn me on. There was some excitement – thing were starting to happen, but no matter how long I went at it I never achieved satisfaction. After one play session in the shower (yes, it’s 100% waterproof!), I gave up in frustration and turned the shower head on my clitoris, coming in a matter of seconds. So maybe the best use for this toy is for foreplay and teasing.
It takes 3 AA batteries and the controls are easy to use. I like the power button because it’s straightforward to turn it off quickly. Each motor is controlled separately, so it’s possible to just use the teaser or just use the rotation. There is also a button that makes the rotation switch directions continually. It can be quite noisy. I didn’t feel like I could use it with the kids in the house.
I know that this is supposed to be a luxury high-end vibrator. There may well be people who get intense pleasure from using the Love Diamond, but sadly, I am not one of them. This might be the first vibrator I’ve ever tried that I can’t get off with at all.
Bottom line: all show, no go.
Grade: D
Other posts you might be interested in:
- Review: Silicone Jack Rabbit
- Review: Mystic Wand
- Review: My Mini-Miracle Massager Pleasure Kit
- Review: njoy Fun Wand
- Review: Divine Temptation
I took a really long shower today. I’ve been so turned on lately. Harold and I had sex before I even got out of bed this morning, but then the children got into an argument and needed us before I came. It’s difficult for me to let go enough to orgasm with the children downstairs. I know that I might need to launch into mommy mode at any second so I don’t fully relax. But the shower is another matter.
The kids rarely enter the bathroom when I’m there – and they never open the shower door. I’m supposed to be naked there, so nothing is unusual. This morning Harold was handling everything for me anyway so no interruptions. I could luxuriate to my heart’s content – or until the hot water ran out.
I take my time when I make love to a partner, but when I masturbate it’s often very brief and businesslike. Today I focused on sensation, loving myself, and honoring my sexuality. Yes, I got myself off and it was hot.
I used the rough shower stream on my nipples, a vibrator on my clit, and an internal bullet vibe to come against. All the sensations combined to put me over the top. But I also spent time just letting the warm water flow against my skin. I let go of my wandering thoughts and watched the droplets form and reform against the tile. I basked in the rare Seattle sun, shadows of leaves dancing across my thighs. I spent a good long time soaping myself up, letting my hands slide over my body, celebrating each part. Even brushing my teeth became an erotic exercise. I felt fresh, clean, and sacred.
That’s the funny thing. Self care and good hygiene become so routine and boring, but really everything we do to take care of our bodies is sacred. Today I took a shower as an act of love – love for myself. I slowed down and remembered how to breathe. I was respectful of myself. I slowly built to release. I lingered in the lovely sensations. It’s a gift, this time I gave to myself, lovemaking for one.
Seattle was hit with what amounts to a serious snow storm (for this area) last week. Our power was out for nearly 100 hours, with over a foot of snow and trees and branches falling everywhere because of the ice. We’re not used to this kind of wintery weather. Especially when we lost the water and land line at my house.
Our poly family lives in 2 houses. We are basically prepared for adverse conditions, provided we share resources. We ended up at Harold and Melanie’s house because they have a fireplace, a generator, and working water. We actually did very well. The hard part is keeping children busy for long hours. At the end of the day, I was relieved to burrow under the covers and roll around in bed with Joel. It was under these circumstances that I tried out California Exotics l’Amour Premium Power Pack 8-Speed Bullet.
Under mountains of wool blankets and down comforters, I warmed myself up with my favorite vibrator on my clit. Then I inserted the bullet part of l’Amour Premium Power Pack. It’s very smooth and a good shape and size for internal use. A cord attaches it to the controller. It’s easy to use, with only two buttons. I don’t like that you have to go through all 8 speeds to turn the bullet off. The “power pack” takes four AAA batteries. It really is fairly powerful. I’m not sure why it needs so many speeds. It’s true that each increase in speed ramps up the intensity. It’s also pretty loud. Joel and I could hear it under all of those blankets (and inside me), sounding like a jet getting ready for take-off. The lower speeds seem gratuitous.
Unfortunately, I am not a person for whom internal vibes work well. Maybe it’s my anatomy – my uterus tips back instead of forward. I tried to find a good position, but I mostly just felt like it was vibrating my rectum. I added my favorite vibrator back into the mix. Coming took much longer than normal, but I did eventually orgasm, and having the bullet inside me made coming more intense.
Ultimately, this is not the toy I would chose to use internally. It works okay, but I don’t like having the cord and controller. It also doesn’t get anywhere near my g-spot, which is my preference. It is definitely not a toy to be shared since it is impossible to sterilize. This bullet was interesting foreplay for a snow day, but I prefer the warmth of Joel’s arms. L’Amour Premium Power Pack 8-Speed Bullet doesn’t rate a place in my sex kit.
Bottom Line: An adequate, but unexceptional internal bullet vibe.
Grade: C
